Far Memories

Far memories are what I call past life experiences. I came into the world with many, and over the years have awakened to many more. Each expressed some part of the lessons I have chosen to learn on my journey back to Peace. I remember many of my deaths and many of my awakenings among my spiritual family between 'lives'. I have had fifty-five human lifetimes, not always expressing Light, but always called
to it.

When you first return to the human form you are still full of the demonic energies and memories of who you were after you fell. They reside in your subconscious mind and can come through as nightmares. You have to work through them, just as humans learn to love and nurture themselves through the lessons they are learning. You were sent to be human. You cannot escape this part of your journey, as much as you would often like to. It is very easy to fall back into 'old ways', to become a murderer or worse, for it was a part of your nature for a long time. It is in recognising that you are capable of doing these things, and choosing not to, that you advance spiritually as a human. Even now, many lifetimes away from my return Home, I can still remember what it felt like to have claws, to rend and tear, to rip the heart from someone and eat it, warm and bubbling. I would have fit in well in the Aztec society, or among cannibals, but I never experienced those societies, but I have walked among the Anazazi as one of their 'gods'.

Past life memories are a tool that helps each person understand the karma they are experiencing in their lifetime. When you can access certain memories, spontaneously or through regression therapy and other techniques, you can see the patterns of learning you have chosen. You will find that there are themes that run through the different memories, based on emotions; for it is unexpressed emotions that weave the barriers and boundaries around us.

But remember, if you are going to investigate this, make sure you have a competent therapist helping you, for it is possible to leave parts of your 'self' in the far past, or bring something back from those time periods that does not work to your greater good. You can also get lost in traumatic events and need someone to talk through the memories with as you release them and change your life. And release them you must - so that you can be free and find peace and healing. I know of some people who still relive events such as the sinking of the Titanic simply because it is spectacular and they are frightening of being less than they could be if they let it all go.

Once the angels had collected me I began reviewing the various themes in my life memories. An obvious one was guilt and a calling towards the 'church', any church, looking for God. I had had lifetimes where I served in religious organisations, from working as a child in the kitchen at Glastonbury in England, to being a Daughter of Isis (in the dark) at Karnack in Egypt. Going back to these places in this current lifetime helped me to connect more clearly to the messages from those times that still existed in my psyche. Having 'gone home' to Glastonbury again just recently, I know how strongly those past memories can affect you, in different ways, at different times. On this visit I knew I had spent my whole life there, probably as a servant because I believe only men were priests in that time period. I sat in the energy of having grown 'very old' there and knew that I had loved, and been loved, in the walls of the Abbey. Memories are activated at a time of most benefit to your learning. On my first visit to Glastonbury I had only connected with the child. This time I connected to a huge sense of peace.

The temple of Karnack in Egypt still takes my breath away, although it is a ruin now. Recently I saw a pictorial representation of what it had looked like when I lived there in the past and the urge to go 'home' was so strong I wanted to jump into the cinema screen. As a priestess of Isis I spent many years there. When I 'returned' to Egypt a few years ago I connected to the Isis energy both in her temple on the island of Agilkia (the temple was moved from Philae after the dam was built) in the Aswan dam, and at Karnack. There were two faces to Isis worship and I had worked in the dark at both temples. But I had also spent time, as a Lightworker, in the Isis temple on Giza plateau that no longer exists anywhere but in my memory.

Another English memory that was released just recently was related to Tintagel and the Dyntagel castle, the likely birthplace of Arthur Pendragon. I visited the town in Cornwall for the first time and stayed very close to the ruin. On the morning I intended to visit the castle I stood on the opposite cliff and felt a wonderful sense of love for the ruin and what it had been. I could not wait to get over there! Later that morning I attempted to climb the new stairs up to the castle itself, and was hit with such an overwhelming sense of fear that I ended up clinging to the rock wall before I had even come close to the edge of the cliff. It had happened when I saw the staircase carved in the rock that the sea has now worn away. I had walked up those stairs in the far past. Actually, I had run up them, to get away from a man who was making me unhappy. I had run into the arms of another man who was very angry with me, and struggling, had either fallen or been thrown off the side of the rocks and into the sea. The fear I felt had been caused by my connecting to the memory of the fall. In this lifetime I have had, not a fear of heights, but a fear of falling. I could climb anything as long as I was on my own, but if someone was with me the fear would hit and I could not go up two steps on the ladder. I had known the memory of that death had been in my energy for many years but had not been able to place the scene until I had seen the rock stairs. It was a memorable trip because the following afternoon I chose to climb the steep side of Michael's Tor at Glastonbury, and while the fear of falling was still real, it did not affect me as much although there were people climbing around me.

Another memory that bought a physical reaction was related to a lifetime where I was sacrificed to the god Pele. I have no love of humidity or great heat, and can get quite ill when the temperature rises above moderate. As a child in this lifetime I would wake from nightmares of being tied to a pallet with woven ropes and thrown off somewhere. I would wake up with my left knee aching and cramped without a good reasons for that reaction. When I reviewed this memory I found a scene in a thick tropical forest. I was part of a Hawaiian community who worshipped the volcano. As a young and beautiful girl I had been dedicated to the volcano God and had spent a year as a 'princess'. At the end of the year I would be sacrificed, but being young I suppose I did not expect it to happen. When the time came I ran away, tried to escape my fate, but this was not allowed - which was why I was tied to the pallet. As the pallet flew out over the active volcano it twisted and turned over, and caught in up-drafts, swung back towards the rocky ledge where I bashed my left knee before finally falling into the red heat. I have no memory of the death, only the pain in my leg - which went away almost immediately after I connected with the memory in this lifetime.

I have other memories, one that I shared with a friend. When we first met the lady and I knew that each was familiar, and that we shared some experience, but we could not pin it down. The answer came quickly one day when we met for lunch with a mutual friend. We turned towards each other and both began to speak. I had been her spirit guide during one lifetime and we remembered in the same instance. In this lifetime she is older than me.

We are all family. It is very seldom that you will interact with someone who is not part of your spiritual family. We choose to be born into the same lifetimes and play different roles for each other. In one lifetime you could be married to someone who was your mother, brother, sister, cousin, or greatest enemy in previous lives - or all of them. You can share karma with people, and balance karma between you, even if you are young and the person you are working with is more than twice your age. Balancing karma means releasing it for both of you, which makes your journeys easier. These are things we can all do for each other when we choose to work with Light.

But you have to remember to choose, and keep confirming your choices, so that your angels and guides can help you in your journey. It is very easy to forget, in your anger and fear, that you are always loved, always provided for, you have only to reach out of help is there. On Samael's world nothing is automatic. You have to keep trying.

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